Out of control

While there are a number of things about which I could blog this afternoon, I will choose only one of them at this moment. Okay, maybe two, but the first one is only to satisfy a brief need to vent.

I started a temp job last Thursday. Things are still in process to get me set up on the company network drives, and with usernames and passwords and appropriate user rights to the programs I need to use. This was all supposed to be done by Monday morning, so that I could be in full swing this week. We're still waiting for it. I'm having a hard time getting any real work done because I don't have access to the drives or programs I need. It's been really frustrating having nothing to do all day (hence I'm now blogging briefly while at work). My supervisor is off-site today, so she's not around to be able to light a fire under the Help Desk's rear end.

Okay, I'm done with that.

Ben made bread this morning, with some dough I had previously made and frozen. He packed my lunch (as usual), and I went on my merry way to work (where I would sit around and do nothing for a good part of the day). We are apparantly out of lunch meat, so --thinking ahead -- Ben pulled some frozen turkey breast out of the freezer last night. Well, I've not done great with homemade bread since becoming pregnant, but it's previously been because I've have a pregnancy-related aversion to wheat. Now the bread is just too dense for me to deal with very well. It takes far too much effort to eat and it's not satisfying because it takes too much work. Also, as previously mentioned, I don't like turkey. I can usually deal with turkey deli meat in sandwiches, but not 1/4-inch thick slices right off the breast. That's what Ben put in my sandwiches. Turkey, cheese, and lettuce, in between the bread I'm having a hard time swallowing (literally). I just couldn't eat it.

I got emotional thinking about the money I would waste buying lunch when Ben had taken the time to pack my lunch for me. I wiped my tears away, and walked down the hall to the in-house mini-deli that we have here at work. They only had one salad left (which didn't look very good), so I ordered a cup of chili and a bag of Fritos (to mix in the chili). The lady rang me up, and I pulled out my credit card. She said cash only. I thought I was going to lose it. I could feel the lump rising in my throat, and the tears springing to my eyes. I usually don't carry cash with me, and today is no exception. Well, there was a woman next to me in line who works a couple cubicles down from me, whose name I barely know (Michele). She knows I’m pregnant and thinks it’s the greatest thing, especially since it’s my first and I’m going to stay home after the birth (she did for 10 years). She piped up and asked the cashier to put it on a tab for me to pay tomorrow. The cashier looked dubious, so Michele said to put it on her tab, and I'd pay it off tomorrow.

I was so grateful. I only had 10 minutes left in my lunch break, it's snowing outside, and I really didn't want to deal with going out to get lunch (especially since another co-worker had already gone out to get lunch, and offered to pick something up for me).

Although if I had gone out, it would have been to Chipotle, which I absolutely love.

I'm totally over it now (I was over it by the time I finished my chili). I think it's funny, in fact. One of the best pieces of advice I was ever given was this: If you're going to laugh about it in 20 years, why not laugh now?